I’ve had a love/hate relationship with my long hair for as long as I can remember. There was only one time where our relationship turned ugly. It’s been four years since “the incident.” I couldn’t handle it anymore and chopped off all my hair.
For anyone out there with long hair, I feel you. Here are the everyday struggles of what it’s like to have long hair.
1. When you instantly recognize the hell you’ve put yourself in because you left the house without a hair tie.
“You did this to yourself. YOU DID THIS TO YOURSELF.” – my inner monologue. Just a lot of swearing at yourself inside while this happens.
2. When you hate yourself even more because now you don’t have something to tie your hair back with when you’re eating.
First of all, is this not the cutest picture ever? Second of all, don’t you hate eating with one hand holding the utensil and the other one holding your hair back?
3. When your hair gets caught in literally everything.
It gets caught on your backpack strap or your purse or worse…THE DREADED ZIPPER. You’re doing this all while having the same expression as Heidi where you’re trying to act like everything’s okay, but inside you’re internally screaming.
4. When your showers are so much longer than everyone else’s because you have to deal with all that hair.
And everybody might hate you for using all the hot water, but whatever! It literally takes forever for you just to shampoo your hair!
5. When it takes a lifetime for your hair to air dry.
The worst is when you go to bed with wet hair and wake up with…DAMP HAIR. It takes a good 12 hours for your hair to air dry completely.
6. When it’s windy outside and you know it’s game over.
And then once the wind dies down, you’re trying to use your fingers to comb through your hair and all you’re doing is pulling out your hair from all the knots.
7. Just kidding. It’s game over when it’s windy outside AND you’re wearing lip gloss.
It’s the worst because you wreck your makeup AND your hair. Who wants to be walking around with sticky hair? *throws out all lip gloss because it’s too painful to deal with*
8. When you spend more time debating whether or not to style your hair than actually styling it.
You’re spending all that time debating and then by the time you’ve decided, you’re late so you just do the usual: put it up in a ponytail or bun!
9. When you decide to curl or straighten it and you start to regret it halfway through because your arms hurt.
And then you start thinking about how out of shape you are and what a mess you are because you can’t even get it together to lead a well-balanced life. And then too much pondering leads to forgetting you’re holding a hot metal instrument to your hair.
10. When you’re always wondering why you leave your hair long if it ultimately goes into a bun or a ponytail.
Every day it’s the same thing! “Oh, should I try some fancy hairstyle today? LOL, WHO AM I KIDDING? IN A PONYTAIL IT GOES.”
11. When you want to buy a top or dress that has fancy detailing on the back but you know it’s useless since nobody can see it.
But you buy it anyway because YOU ARE AN INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND YOU CAN GET WHATEVER YOU WANT. But ultimately, you wear the shirt and forget that nobody can see the back unless you happen to have your hair up that day.
12. When you have so many split ends, but you dread going for a haircut because you might be convinced by the hairstylist that going short would look great on you.
The worst is when you actually start to believe the hairstylist and the hair magazines.