Tweets That Are Funny Because They’re Damn True
"Ur weird if ur on holiday n u don't go up to ur hotel room and lay on the bed naked eatin Lays."
So what you’re saying is, you’re a child?
If you laugh at a kid's joke that kid will tell the exact same joke at slightly louder volumes 8,000 times in a row.
— Røb Fee (@robfee) April 22, 2017
Respond by slapping said child in the face and kill their love of comedy from the start.
I hate when I’m running on the treadmill for half an hour and look down to see it’s been 4 minutes.
— Kent Graham (@KentWGraham) March 30, 2017
Throw it away. No one needs a treadmill that taunts you into thinking it’s a time machine. No one.
Don’t feel hung up on this particular situation
R u ever having like a nice chill night and then u decide to casually check up on someone via social media who ruined your life…
— amalia (@mollysoda) March 16, 2017
You want to block them but u know that it would just make u seem dramatic and then u start gaslighting yourself.